I dun know how to begin this....Yesterday, I was trying not to be obsessed with my unhappiness but today...I was back in the dark pit..The dark and gloomy pit that had been my hideout for many years now...

And here i am again...complaining bout life and the injustice of it all....

But how do i begin????

I'm so messed up...My mind's in a terrible state now...My heart is shattered again and again; that I'm not sure if it could be glued back together....again...

I'm trembling with anger while I'm writing this...How can life treat me this way..What did i do wrong..Dun i deserve even a lil dose of HAPPINESS to light up my discontented life??...Why me??Why this???Why???Why??Why???

This thing that happened to me...THIS UNFAIRNESS...(sigh)..I'm so sick of it...I'm BLOODY TIRED OF IT ALL!!! I feel worn out...jaded...I can't live life this way anymore...It's killing me...Everything happening to me is taking away "the life" in me..I'm so depressed to think that I was such a Happy Girl in school, I'm sure all my frenz remembered me as one heck of a LOUD and BUBBLY girl....glowing with happiness all the time (most of the time anyway). But that was before....

Now...I'm more reserved..and people who knew me ONLY after i left school labeled me as a "loner"...yeah, and i can't help but agree with them...coz I do feel like a LONER living my life the way i do now...

The injustice of my life- it's the reason why i love to dream so much...whenever something bad happen, i'd forced myself not to think of it, not to be drowned in the pool of misery. Instead, I'd make up happy dreams and hide in it, in the world of make-believe, where I'd be giddy with pleasure and delight. But NO! Even a HAPPINESS OFFERED IN DREAMS couldn't last long for me..the green-eyed monster called life- it just had to disrupt it for me. And when the dreams are taken away, i'm jolted back to reality...andthe pain would be more intense than before. It's as if life is trying to punish the girl who tried to deny the suffering it enforced on her...And how unfair could it get......?

I'm giving up.........Seriously...I'm giving it all up.......Come ere life, take what u want from me...Take whatever it is that u want from me..then, LEAVE ME ALONE!!...And get the h**l out of my .................................... LIFE ???!$%#!%!~!!!!????! Argggghhhh!!!!!!!!