In my entire life, I can't seem to run away from people who considered themselves to be of greater class than me and people who loved putting me down.

There's this lady in my current life who - I suspect - thinks that she's better than everyone in terms of looks, style and every other aspects of personal being. She looks okay I guess, but only because she went to such great length to maintain her body. Whenever she started bloating she'd go to slimming centers and such, everytime. I don't mind that she wants to do everything she could to maintain her beauty..maybe that's what her husband expects of her. Maybe that was what made him fell in love with her in the first place. But the thing that I couldn't stand is how she'd put down others - especially me - whenever we got together for a chat.

Recently, one of my favourite past time is to look through various websites, and the entries that usually caught my eyes are the wedding entries.

One day, the lady in question said something to the effect . "Did u have a look at *this particular* photographer's site?Notice tak ada gambar this one GEMOK lady yang tangkap gambar daring daring? Euwwww...that's just so geli. Kalau kurus takpa la". (see how mean she can get sometimes). I noted that when she said this, she managed to make ME feel as if I was the one she was talking about.Don't ask me how, you just have to be there to know it. And she was making such disgusting faces when she said this that I wanted to smack her and shout "Hey! Go look into the mirror and look at your disgusting face with all your skins peeling out. Surely your husband-to-be would be disgusted to kiss your cheeks ekk". Oh well, that was too harsh I know, but dammit. This lady...she thinks worldly of herself. And I can't help but wishing that something would happen to make her realize that she's not THAT good or perfect after all.

I used to love speaking to her. Asking her opinion on matters I thought I wasn't very good at. However, one day another friend of mine expressed her wonder on the reason for me to keep on going to this girl when obviously, she was belittling me. It made me realize then that everytime after I talked to this lady, I'd feel bad about myself. I'd feel like I'm the ugliest, fattest girl there ever is. I'd feel like I'm so uncool compared to everybody else in this world. The way she speaks about things, it'd made people think that she's the grandest one ever alive.

And then I started to see the real picture. I started to see that she's not that grand after all. Of coz she talks as if she wears ONLY good branded clothes and she owns only qualities expensive stuff, and she's the better one among us with a more than a perfect life. But that's because she wanted to make up for things that she wasn't able to achieve. Maybe she got satisfaction by making people THINK that she's better than them, but after I took a good, careful look at her and compare it with myself, I guess there were times that I did better than her, in certain things that is.

The conclusion I made about her is that the girl is so full of herself, she cannot accept the fact that some people has more than her, in certain things. Especially those she looked down on.

Today, she made some other remarks about my wedding day. I only had to laugh when I heard about it, as I saw it as another attempt of her to cover up her jealousy and telling herself that she's better. Haha.

I say good luck little friend. I hope you find happiness with whatever it is that you're trying to achieve. And mean as I am, I still pray that you'll truly find happiness always.