Self-obsession melanda. Gambar2 were taken with Amin' phone camera. Mine cannot use nemore coz gambar menjadi tersangat blur.

* It's the weekend where Amin came to KL to shop for our wedding ring. The first day, went to tempah the ring and then lepak at Pakcik Ghouse's house. Hence the pictures with the cousins. Second day, dating!!!!!!!

+ saya dan incik reza husnain.Aiyo!he's sooo gebu lah!

+ si najwa yang kuat berposing tapi lagi kuat merajuk :-D

+ tah sapa tah *oink*oink*

I can't stop giggling.

Just a couple of minutes back, I was sitting with one of the bosses. He was going through the letter I was told to draft. I was humming quietly to myself when I noticed a fly buzzing near his head. For a couple of times, the boss subconciously waved his hand to get rid of the fly.

And he continued checking the letter. But the fly just wouldn't go away. He kept on buzzing and hitting the boss's head. Meanwhile, the boss started to get irritated, he slaped the fly so hard but unfortunately didn't hit the target. As he got more and more irritated he suddenly bawled madly " Ni apahal lalat ni?!!!" Oh gosh! I found it so hilarious I'm sure my face got red trying to hold back the laughter bubbling inside me.

At that moment, I tried not look at his face. I thought of other things beside the fly and the boss. As soon as he finished checking the letter, I quickly gathered it into my arms and I practically ran into my cube. But somehow along the way, I jsut couldn't hold it back anymore, I hollered with laughter thinking how funny he looked like getting mad at the fly. And guess what?? Suddenly I heard "Ba*z*rah!Sini jap". I thought, shit! He heard me. What am I gonna do now?

But thankfully, he didn't. It turned out that he only wanted to clarify something. I went back to my cube smiling, and yes! I'm still in a fit of giggles even as I'm writing this down.




Some more pictures of Ariez...ada Ariez ngan my fave cartoon character-Winnie the Pooh and also have a picture of him tengah sengih sambil pejam mata lar! Ahakz ...

This was taken when he was a day old.

Winnie!Winnie! ;-D

Hikhikhik...they're taking my picture! :-D

Oolllloooo...olllooo..shh shh!Whenever I pegang, he'll nangis also. I'm just hopeless with all them babies. *Sigh*

P/S : Since nak upload kat blogspot ni bukan main susah...if u want more just check out my fotopage aite! :-)

Some more pictures of Ariez...ada gambar ngan my fave cartoon character - Winnie the Pooh and also have a picture of him tengah sengih lar!

(Hikhikhik...they're taking my picture! :-D)

P/S : Since nak upload kat blogspot ni bukan main susah...if u want more just check out my fotopage aite! :-)

"It was nice having someone pays attention to you, takes you out to dinner, calls you just to say Hi. And it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside just by having him stare at you."
A quote from someone's blog. Just can't help but agree with her. Haha..kan ayu kan?




Hidup tak lagi terasa sepi, jiwa tak lagi terasa sunyi. Ketika ada teman yang peduli, dan mahu untuk berbagi... (http://chinta.fotopages.com/)

I love this photographer. He's got a great talent for capturing moments and emotions. What's more, I admire his aptitude to pair the pictures with B E A U T I F U L W O R D S.

Certain people labelled me a "mat rempit" type of girl. All because I'm a sucker for beautiful (jiwang - jiwang) + meaningful words and captions. AND because i love spending time at parks, be it by myself or with my loved one. But do I care what you think of me? Nawh. Coz I think you are just jealous of me. ;-)

I might be a bit reserved. I devour dreams and fantasies. That's why i love spending time alone by myself.

Reading beautiful words make me feel beautiful inside. While you, yOu make me feel ungrateful for the way I am. So that's why I love words and not you, get it?

Once, I was talking to this group of people (sort of friends of mine). I told them that I went to this place alone during lunch and one lady actually said "Ey, pegi sorang2 ka? If it was me, I'd feel macam orang bodo diri tepi jalan waiting for a cab...ALONE". Oh, well...dah malas nak bertekak...i just let the remark died away. At another time, I was telling them how heavenly it was spending my weekend at Amcorp Mall (PJ) and the same lady said (something to the effect) to me "Gi sorang2 tempat camtu? Tak rasa cam bodo ke?If it was KLCC then okie la go alone". I was like (dalam hati la) "Kalau orang bodo like you maybe la rasa bodo kot coz dah memang bodo. But to smart girls like me...rasa cool je pun. No big deal what."

Another time, the very same lady told me that she couldn't imagine why I'd go dating at the parks cause, plainly - she said - they are dating spots for mat rempit. Now, let me get this straight. What you're saying is that I shouldn't be doing something I love just because the majority of world's population think it uncool? Like going to places alone? And devouring my precious time at the parks?

Have you ever asked yourself what I think of you?Really..I think you are a nobody. A woman who think so highly of yourself and trying hard to be cool while the the truth is you're just the most pathetic creature I've ever met in my entire life.

But does it matter, what i think?




Aiseh..What's wrong la with blogspot ni? I dunno why all the links in my sidebar ni pi turun kat bawah plak. I've tried doing all things imagineable in the template to bring it back up, tapi tak jadik pun! Cess...sungguh menjatuhkan imej saya sebagai bakal isteri kepada seorang IT Support. I just can't wait for my turn to switch to Beta Blogger or whatever sh*t tu.

Anyway, at noon today I had a nice long lunch at Sogo with Lea or Edzy as I call her ( thanx to Encik tareh for giving her my fon no.)

Now, the last time i saw Edzy was about 2 years back when she'd just given birth to her daughter - Lea Damea. She was still in confinement at that time. Today after 2 long years, she still looks the same, still the same old Edzy - or so i thought...

However, after a long talk i had with her, i realized that she's not the Edzy i knew from school. Gone were the girl who laughed like the devil (haha! seriously, u should hear her laugh dulu2...satu school bergegar tau!). She's now so polite and feminine, the opposite of me who still speaks as if I'd just swallowed a microphone. I guess being a wifey and a mother turned her into a more matured person than she was before.

Anyway, dah lama since i had a good laugh with my old school friends (Widad doesn't count coz we only got close during our Uni years). We talked, gossiped and laughed like crazy. At times when things get a lil bit hysterical we'd give guilty, apologetic glances at people around us. I sooo enjoyed my lunch today like i've never done in a long, long time.

Spending time with her today, I was transported back to my childhood where i spent most of my days at Edzy's house as her maktok (my tok sedara) took care of me when my mum worked.We were very close as a child. We went places and did everything together, even mandi pun sama-sama!

I still remember that time when we were already in Standard 6 and I'd developed a certain feeling of shyness, so i refused to mandi with her. And that young lady was so upset that she didn't speak to me for the rest of the day. Haiya.. This girl could sulk like no one else could tau!

On another incident, dulu-dulu besides playing masak - masak and dolls, we always liked to organize our very own colouring and drawing competition. The contestant were myself, Edzy and Bu Lea (her older sister). Somehow, i always won the competition. Edzy wasn't happy with it, she pointed out that i won because the panel of juries (consists of my maktok and aunty) liked me more. Then one day, after we've completed the drawings she suggested that we changed it before we showed them to the juries. I agreed. And surprise! surprise! her suspicion turned out to be true as the drawing i was holding (which is actually Edzy's drawing) was selected as the WINNER OF THE DAY!! Haha...just when i thought it was my talent that made me winner...Oh well...

Thinking back, I have many good memories with Edzy not only during childhood but also my teenage years as we went to the same (girls) school in our secondary years. Though we hang up with a different crowd, but we enjoyed the fact and made sure everyone in school knew that we're cousins. The best memories I had with her at school is during kelas agama, where we'd sit at the back of the class and made fun of the ustazah (garang) and some "celebrity friend" who we didn't really like. Man!! I really had fun doing it. Haha..

Now that I'm all grown up and paying my own bills, I just wish that I could go back to the times when all I had to worry about is how to get good grades in exams so I won't get scolded by my parents.

* Sigh * I wanna be teenagers again!!




Stupid blogspot. Just when i feel this great need to write in here, dia nak buat maintenance plak. :-(

It's been quite some time since i had a good cry. Now i need one terribly. There's this void, empty feeling inside me now. What's the cause of it..tatau la so don't ask me.

Dah lama tak have this feeling macam konon-konon everybody in the world hate you and they do bad things just to spite you. While you, in turn hate everyone back. Now I'm feeling that way..again, after such a long time.So today sebaik-baik sampai di office, i just sit here in my cube and staring off into space. Didn't go mingle around with anybody. Haven't talk to anyone in the office and not planning to. Not unless there's a great need for it.

*Sigh*

Oh! Been having this ENORMOUS craving for chocolate lately. Eaten a bar of Mars choc, Nor's bar of Cadbury Hazelnut (she wasn't at home & i just had to eat it masa tu jugak..so lepas makan baru cakap kat dia) AND some Caramelo choc to satisfy the craving, tapi unfortunately it's still there.

Somehow, I think that both the craving and the mood swing are cause by the imbalance of hormone (dulu2 time period canni la). Tapi nak kata it's the time of the month, tak pulak. *Sigh*





SATU

aku ini adalah dirimu
cinta ini adalah cintamu

aku ini adalah dirimu
jiwa ini adalah jiwamu

rindu ini adalah rindumu
darah ini adalah darahmu

tak ada yang lain selain dirimu
yang selalu ku puja
ku sebut namamu
di setiap hembusan nafasku
ku sebut namamu,
ku sebut namamu

dengan tanganmu aku menyentuh
dengan kakimu aku berjalan
dengan matamu aku memandang
dengan telingamu aku mendengar
dengan lidahmu aku bicara
dengan hatimu aku merasa

tak ada yang lain selain dirimu
yang selalu ku puja
ku sebut namamu
di setiap hembusan nafasku
ku sebut namamu,

ku sebut namamu

P/S : Cute isn't he??! Muka Alfian ka muka kakak? Nak baby gakkk!! (haha! mesti Emi kata "budak niii...gataiii!")

SMILE !

1. To show a feeling of happiness, pleasure or amusement by means of a specific expression on the face.

2. To be radiant

:-)

( http://www.guerlain.com/index.asp?page=gbasp/parfum/&logo=1 )




My friend Dee came to see me couple of nights ago.

Dee and I have been good friends for quite a long time. We've gone through a lot together. Our friendship is the kind of friendship where no matter how long we haven't see each other, in the end when any one of us were in trouble we'd always find solace in one another. And it was always easy to pick up where we left, even after such long time

Anyway, Dee wasn't really in big trouble. Only thing is she needed to talk to someone coz she's broken hearted. The man she has crush on (i have a hunch that she actually loves him) married another woman. Hmmm... i'm no expert in this thing because it never happens to me that way. However, i could just imagine how shattered my heart would be if the man i love married another woman.

So given the circumstances, i couldn't do or say much on the subject. Furthermroe, I didn't want to patronize her by giving konon-kononnya rational advices, scolding her and telling her not to cry because somehow i know that's not what she wanted from me. What she wanted and needed was someone who'll listen to her and not judging her by how she feels and acts. So i let her do what she wanted to. I listened and smiled. And nodded...

After listening to all she had to say, my only regret is that people keep on giving her not-so-clever advises. Some tell her not to cry when it's the only thing she's capable of doing to let out her frustration. Even worse, some of these people told her that she's not to worry, they're pretty sure that he'll come back to her one day, maybe in 1 year, maybe 2, who knows- they say.

I totally disagree with these people. My only advise to her that night is after she's done crying, try to live the moment. Don't dwell on the future too much coz you do not know what the future has in store for you. He might or might not comes back to you. But that's not the issue. The thing is to learn to accept things that life dish out for you. Surely God knows what's best for you. You might suffer now, but in the long run it could be the BEST thing that ever happened to you.

The long talk I had with Dee that night got me around thinking...

Apa sebenarnya yang kita maksudkan dengan "a twist of fate"? When we say, takdir selalu tak memihak pada kita...apa maksudnya tu? Takdir kah yang buat kita jadi jahat, sedih dan sebagainya? Or is it our own doing?

Kita selalu dengar orang cakap yang takdir kita dah termaktub sejak azali. Dan sesetengah orang menggunakan alasan ini untuk tidak melakukan yang terbaik dalam hidup mereka. "Aku dah memang ditakdirkan jadi jahat, so buat macam mana pun aku tetap jahat".

Tapi pernah tak kita berfikir, dimanakah keadilan Tuhan itu kalau Tuhan menetapkan seseorang itu jahat dan masuk neraka, manakala seorang lagi itu baik dan akan masuk syurga. Mana keadilan Tuhan yang selalu kita sebut-sebut tu?Kita kata Tuhan tu Maha Adil, tapi adilkah kalau Tuhan buat macam tu?

Di sinilah kita sebenarnya salah. I had a very interesting discussion with some religious people about this thing long time ago. And it really opened my eyes, mind and soul into seeing the real justice of Allah.

Perkara-perkara yang termaktub sejak azali di Lauh Mahfuz tu sebenarnya bukan lah ditetapkan oleh Tuhan. Kita sebenarnya yang bertanggungjawab dalam memikir serta melakukan setiap tindakan yang kita ambil. It's us who decides what and who we want to be. Cumanya, Tuhan tahu apa yang kita akan buat even before He created us. Dia kan Maha Mengetahui.

Contohnya, si A ingin mencuri di satu kedai tapi setelah sampai di situ, dia tiba-tiba berubah fikiran. Tiba-tiba dia terfikirkan siksaan dan azab yang akan ditanggungnya sekiranya dia melakukan perbuatan tersebut. Jadi, Tuhan kah yang tetapkan hati dia agar tidak mencuri, ataupun itu adalah keputusan yang diambilnya sendiri?

Sama lah situasinya macam Rasulullah (pbuh). Kita selalu cakap "bolehla.. he's the Prophet, God MADE him the Prophet so dia ada keistimewaan. Kita mana mampu nak buat camtu" Sebenarnya, kenapa Rasullullah telah dipilih sebagai Rasulullah? Sebab..he MADE the effort to be Rasullullah. Takdak sorang manusia lain pun di dunia ni yang telah berusaha sebaik beliau untuk mengenali dan mencintai Allah dan agamanya. He's the best because he wanted to be the best. And he took the effort to be the best, made all the effort required to be the CHAMPION - to be Rasulullah. Dan akhirnya Allah telah memilih beliau untuk menjadi kekasihnya.

Mungkin ada yang akan cakap " kalau camtu camana before Nabi Muhammad was born pun Allah dah cakap that he's going to be Rasullullah sedangkan beliau belum buat apa2 effort pun untuk melayakkan diri beliau sebagai Rasullullah. Well, Allah kan All-Knowing. Dia dah tahu setiap benda, even tiny weeny lil things yang akan berlaku. Dia tahu apa keputusan yang akan kita ambil, Dia tahu sekiranya kita akan berubah fikiran atau tidak. He knows EVERYTHING there is to know about us, about everything.

Jadi, sebenarnya..kita perlu berusaha untuk menjadi yang terbaik. Allah tahu, tapi kita tak tahu what lies in future for us. Jadi kita masih harus berusaha untuk mencapai yang terbaik. Besides that...kita tak sepatutnya menyalahkan tadir. Sebab takdir itu adalah hasil dari perbuatan kita sendiri.

So to Dee and my other friends, jom la kita cuba lakukan yang terbaik. Takdir jangan disalahkan, sebaliknya cuba tengok setiap sesuatu yang buruk tu dari the positive side. How can we turn the bad things that happen to us into something good. I know,kita mesti mampu buat if we try hard enough because, well... God loves us all doesn't He??

And Dee, I love you my buddy...so gambate!!! :-)




I've got myself a date tonite...YEAYYYY!!!!

but it's with my girlfriend lar...

Still, the thought that someone wants to come see me on a working night could only cheer me up!

Amin, jangan jeles! ;-p




I'm so takut. Takut h*ntu. Waiting in the office alone, tunggu Noe come to my office then we'll wait together for Hernione to come get us.

hmmm...tadi amin called. I didn't picked up the phone coz i was in a meeting, he called banyak2 kali. Then he sent me a text asking me why i didn't answer the calls. He said there's something wrong with his leg and it's gonna get amputated. I was a bit risau, couldn't concentrate dalam meeting.

Then after the meeting i called him back. I told him "it's okie kalau kena potong, tapi bila dah cacat nanti please dun be too hard on me k" haha! Gotcha!! nak sangat menipu orang...nka attract attention tak kena gaya...muehehehehe...

But seroiusly, even if it was true...it wouldn't change my feeling for you sikit pun. I'll always love you no matter what, coz it's not ur leg or ur hands or ur body that i love. I love YOU..even if ur without a leg. Even if u lose your job, even if anything bad happen to you...I'll always be by your side. (jiweng plak dah). So Mohd Amin, takyah la nak test2 my love for you by making up stories...tak menjadi pun. Macam la orang nka pecaya sangat ;-p

Okie la the office's empty.Takut!!Nak cabut tunggu Noe kat lobby la...




Been listening to these few songs over and over again...

I like "Iris" by Awie so much, but Amin doesn't. He said it's because he doesn't like Awie...ala, i dun like Awie too but the song is just sooooo touching-you-deep-inside. heh! u r so not romantic la Encik Amin... buhsan betoi.

Baik cinta ngan abang tam camni...dah la suara sedap, lagu pun jiweng ... *sigh* abang taaaammmm... i love you!!! hehehe

DEWA - Pupus

Aku tak mengerti,
apa yang kurasa
rindu yang tak pernah begitu hebatnya
aku mencintaimu lebih dari yang kau tahu
meski kau takkan pernah tahu

aku persembahkan hidupku untukmu
telah ku relakan, hatiku padamu
namun kau masih bisu, diam seribu bahasa
dan hati kecilku bicara

baru kusedari cintaku bertepuk sebelah tangan
kau buat remuk sluruh hatiku
semoga waktu akan mengilhami sisi hatimu yang beku
semoga akan datang keajaiban
hingga akhirnya kau pun mau

aku mencintaimu lebih dari yang kau tau
meski kau takkan pernah tau

p/s : I'm so tense...came to work this morning penuh semangat...tapi now i just can't wait to go back! Suppose to go to a meeting at Pusat Bandar Damansara with company's driver. Awal2 lagi dah apply the car and approved, tapi last2 minute depa suruh pi ngn cab plak coz keta nak guna for something else. Who the hell am i? Your pecacai angkut najis?? Grrr...




I'm boredddd! I'm so bored. Can't wait for the weekend to arrive..I just wanna sleep in my wangi room all day long.

Hah..mak, abah and my brothers will be coming here end of the month. Tak sabaq nak go play paintball with the twins! Siap la hangpa dua kena tembak ngan kak yah!! Balas dendam dulu asyik dok kena buli ja. Hahahaha (evil laugh)

Anyway, my sister had given birth to a son while i was doing my induction last 2 weeks. Haven't been to see him yet. Heard from my cousin that he's one heck of a cute baby! The name is Muhd. Ariez Zuhayr...Ariez, nama so like elvish kan. Cayalah...nanti besaq ble jadi my Lord-of-The-Ring buddy..hehehe. So now tunggu my sis in law Emi plak get preggy...Emi!Bila i nak dapat another anak sedara nii?? Syiok la jadi aunty! ;-)

On a different note, Amin said i'm so sombong these past few days. Mana ada sombong, orang penat. Yala, before this i called him like 10 times a day but he was always busy la, i'm-on-call-can't-speak-wif-u-now la. Skarang baru tau how it feels like when i do the same.... ;-p PADAN MUKA YEAY!! hahahaha...

Haven't heard from Ayu for quite some time...sms pun tak berbalas. Wonder how she's doing. Hope everything's fine..Dunno when i'll get to meet her again. Haven't even been to see Mickey or Feezah after they gave birth. Ow Gosh! I miss my girlfriends so much!!!

Alaa so many people dok menjenguk my compartment...better stop now!




Back at the office again! *Sigh*

Sooo penat la...i'm physically and mentally exhausted! Wish i could take this whole week off, but my boss said next week plak.

Ermmm....induksi was fine but boring. BTN was horrible! woke up early every morning and stayed up late at nights. Had to be cergas all the time. Had to wear black and white like sekolah asrama kids. Had to speak in front of people!Ceramah ceramah ceramah. Makan makan makan! Glad it's over!Fuuuhhh...

I'm procrastinating...ada a few things to settle but my mind wouldn't work properly. Mata kuyu...rasa sluggish..I long for my lazy weekend at home!!

This Thursday nite might be going to starlite movie..Yeayyy!Can't wait! Yone...jangan tak jadi tau.Aku nak pi beli cushion comei satgiiii!!